Principles For How We Treat Each Other

Principles For How We Treat Each Other

By Suzanne Higbie-Long

​Take a moment to think back to that first day of PJI and remember the Principle that resonated with you.​ Keep this in mind as and self-reflect as we work together today.

My presentation consists of a lil' connection through a lil' competition. You will be given questions to answer throughout the lesson. Scores will be tallied.

Introduction

-You will have 10 seconds to answer each question.

-Click your answer on your computer.​

​​Guidelines

-​We are all winners.

-Thank you for playing along today!​

Winner!

​

Multiple Choice

This principle limits violent damage to the soul and is the practice of mindfulness.

• All Voices Have Value.

• Speaking Your Truth.

• Suspending Judgment.

• Practice...

  Slowing...

  Down...

​-Count to 5 Seconds Before Responding.

-Practice Box Breathing to slow ​your Vagal Nerve function.

-Intentionally practice slowing down in your everyday life.​

Strategies for Slowing Down When Activated

Multiple Choice

Creating space between assumptions and our reactions

requires the use of this Principle.

• Suspending Judgment.

• Listening Deeply.

• Practicing...

  Slowing...

  Down...

• Maintaining Confidentiality.

-Be present in the moment and open your mind to learning from the experience.

-Do your own work in suspending judgments about yourself and others by attending PJI Retreats and Trainings.​

​

​Suspending Judgment

​

Multiple Choice

Before responding, take time to reflect

without immediately filling the space with words.

• Speak Your Truth.

• Respect

  Silence.

• Maintain Confidentiality.

• Identify

  Assumptions.

Explore your own reactions to silence. Does it makes you feel uncomfortable and uneasy or validated and heard?

​

Soften your eyes and look at the speaker as they share.

How to Respect Silence.​

​

Multiple Choice

This Principle teaches us to achieve a

balance between listening, reflecting, speaking and acting.

• Practice asking

  honest and

  open questions.

• Speak

  Your

  Truth.

• Respect

  Silence.

• Listen

  Deeply.

Holding silence in a space is necessary to listen deeply.

Count to 5 after a speaker finishes before responding.​ Reflect while you are in the silence.

​

​

How to ​

Listen Deeply.

Multiple Choice

This Principle requires every participant, leader and group members alike, to presume all are welcomed and to extend hospitality.

• Maintain confidentiality.

• Give space for unpopular answers.

• Create a hospitable and accountable community.

• Listen Deeply.

-Do the work to be comfortable in your own skin so that you may fully welcome others as they are.​

​

Creating a Hospitable and Accountable Community

Multiple Choice

This Principle encourages us to examine

and identify our own judgments, set them aside

and open ourselves to the possibility in learning something new.

• Identify

  Assumptions.

• Speak

  Your

  Truth.

• All Voices

  Have

  Value.

• Create an

  Advice Free Zone.

​-Become aware and identify your assumptions.

-Ask yourself what part of your story leads to your assumptions. Do the work to challenge them by attending PJI Trainings and Retreats.

.

Identifying Assumptions.

Multiple Choice

In this Principle, PJI facilitators work to

protect what is said here, stays here.

• Respect

  Silence,

• Speak

  Your

  Truth.

• All Voices

  Have Value.

• Maintain

  Confidentiality.

-It primes group members to be vulnerable and open to share honestly.

-It is essential for keeping people emotionally and psychologically safe.

-It can help others heal from their past pain and mistrust.​

Why Confidentiality?

Multiple Choice

The Principle is encouraged through the use of "I" Statements.

• All Voices

  Have Value.

• Speak

  Your

  Truth.

• Create an

  Advice

  Free

  Zone.

• Maintain

  Confidentiality

-Use the template above to model an "I" Statement.

-Familiarize and practice use of "I" Statements in your significant relationships.​

-"I" Statements allow the person to take responsibility for their own thoughts and feelings.​

​

Strategies for "I" Statements

Multiple Choice

This Principle teaches us what to do when things get difficult.

• Respect

  Silence.

• Speak

  Your

  Truth.

• Turn to Wonder.

• Practice...

  Slowing...

  Down...

-Use wonder when you begin to feel judgmental or defensive.

-Turn to wonder when things may need to be addressed.​

​

How to Respectfully "Challenge" Ideas

​

What NEW insight has occurred to you as we wrap up?

​

Multiple Choice

This Principle defines a great question as

ambiguous, personal and one that provokes anxiety.

• All Voices

  Have

  Value.

• Speak

  Your

  Truth.

• Give Space

  for Unpopular

  Answers.

• Practice

  Asking

  Honest &

  Open

  Questions.

​-Ask questions which allow the focus person to explore their thought rather than satisfy your own curiosity.

-Give a person autonomy and dignity by asking questions that you cannot possibly know the answer.

-​Read "Guideline for Asking H&O Questions.

​

Strategies for Asking Honest & Open Questions

Multiple Choice

To cultivate this Principle we must replace advice

with curiosity and aim to discover our own truths.

• Listen

  Deeply.

• Create an

  Advice

  Free

  Zone.

• Give

  Space for

  Unpopular

  Answers.

• When Things Get Difficult, Turn to Woner.

-If you are following the other 12 Principles there won't be room to give advice.​

​-It is not our job to "fix" others.

Creating Advice Free Zones.

​

Multiple Choice

In this Principle, the group is trustworthy when a

person feels valued enough to speak and stand for something.

• All Voices

  Have

  Value.

• Speak

  Your

  Truth.

• Suspend

  Judgment.

• Maintain

  Confidentiality.

-Our job is to hold these moments when a person speaks their truth as precious.​

All Voices Have Value

Multiple Choice

In this Principle, the work is in being present and not debate, correct or interpret.

• Listen

  Deeply.

• Give

  Space for

  Unpopular

  Answers.

• Identify

  Assumptions.

• Speak

  Your

  Truth.

Give Space for Unpopular Answers.

​

What NEW insight has occurred to you as we wrap up?

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