Back to school limerick

​I'm no bookworm...

​Today is the first day of school

The summer too short at the pool

school days are long

this is so wrong

I think going to school isn’t cool

​My father insists that I go

Though I argued loud with a No

I squawk and squirm

I’m no bookworm

Sure I know all there is to know

Dad threatened to kick me out

No matter my perfect pout

I’m no fool

Went to school

Now the classics I can spout

At university I excelled

Never an instance was I expelled

Got the knowledge

Finished college

At graduation my Dad’s heart swelled​

​Back to school thoughts

​"You can never be overdressed or overeducated."

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"You learn something new everyday if you pay attention."​

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​-Oscar Wilde

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-​Ray LeBlond

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School tests

The good?

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The bad?

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The ugly?​

​THIS IS A TEST!

​Follow the test rules:

​As you choose your answers, make sure not to leave any stray marks outside of the circle. If any stray marks do escape your circle, you should capture and destroy them before they can multiply – the stray population can get quite out of hand if not properly captured.

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This is a standard test that assesses how well you will perform on standardardized tests. You are permitted to have a ruler with you on this test, but you are NOT permitted to use it. You are permitted to use a calculator on this test, but you are NOT permitted to have one with you.

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You may begin now. You have until the sun explodes and leaves the earth in darkness and makes it impossible to see anything to finish this following test... Or until the teacher says stop.

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Multiple Choice

When you get the test, you should ____________________.

• Start choosing every bubble because then you are guaranteed to get the answers right

• Panic

• Sit quietly and question the meaning of life

• Did I mention the choice to panic?

Multiple Choice

Anyone caught using a colouring pencil will be _____________________.

• Banished to a place where they cannot afford the colouring pencils

• Expelled and forbidden to ever write again

• Given an essay during which you will do nothing, except sharpen all the pencils

• Let off with no consequences

Multiple Choice

No essay is complete unless you include a ______________________ to add perfection.

• Guinea pig

• Drop of blood

• Quote from Harry Potter

• Live tarantula

Multiple Choice

The best word to describe a standardized testing is _______________________.

• Useless

• Meaningless

• A brilliant and flawless program written by exceptionally talented and intelligent people

• Torture

Multiple Choice

When you get to a tricky question you should __________________.

• Give up

• Think

• Remove it from your test

• Use your wild card (make a phone call)