Wordiness and Redundancy in the SAT

Past studies have shown that employees are happier when they work in environments with natural light and sunlight.

• NO CHANGE

• Studies have shown that employees are happier when they work in environments with natural light.

• Studies have shown that employees are happier when they work in environments with natural light and sunlight.

• Studies in the past have shown that employees are happier when they work in environments with natural light.

Tags

CCSS.RL.2.4

CCSS.RL.7.4

New buildings, which were just built, may be designed with these studies in mind.

• NO CHANGE

• New buildings, which were just built recently, may be designed with these studies in mind.

• New buildings, which were just built in the recent past, may be designed with these studies in mind.

• New buildings may be designed with these studies in mind.

Tags

CCSS.RL.2.4

CCSS.RL.7.4

However, some employers and bosses may not be on board.

• NO CHANGE

• However, some employers and bosses may not be on board or buy into the studies.

• However, some employers, bosses, and CEOs may not be on board.

• However, some employers may not be on board.

Lack of exposure to natural sunlight has a significant impact on employees' health.

• NO CHANGE

• Lack of exposure to natural light has a significant impact on employees' health.

• Lack of exposure to natural sunlight has a significant impact on employees' health and health-related issues.

• Lack of exposure to natural sunlight has a significant impact on employees' physical health.

One company in California gained a huge and tremendous boost in employees' morale.

• NO CHANGE

• One company in California gained a huge, substantial, and tremendous boost in employees' morale.

• One company in California gained a tremendous boost in employees' morale.

• One company in California gained employees.

The company was able to enjoy annual electricity cost reductions of $500,000 each year.

• NO CHANGE

• The company was able to enjoy annual electricity cost reductions of $500,000 every year.

• The company was able to enjoy annual electricity cost reductions of $500,000 yearly.

• The company was able to enjoy annual electricity cost reductions of $500,000.

Employees who are sleep deprived and tired are less prone to work at their maximum productivity.

• NO CHANGE

• Employees who are sleep deprived are less prone and less likely to work at their maximum productivity.

• Employees who are sleep deprived and tired are less prone and able to work at their maximum productivity.

• Employees who are sleep deprived do not work at maximum productivity.

Artificial light sources are costly aside from lowering worker productivity.

• NO CHANGE

• Artificial light sources and fluorescent lights are costly aside from lowering worker productivity.

• Artificial light sources are costly aside from lowering worker productivity and efficiency.

• Artificial light sources are costly and expensive aside from lowering worker productivity.

One possibility and option to reconfigure a building's lighting is the installation of full-pane windows.

• NO CHANGE

• One possibility or option to reconfigure a building's lighting is the installation of windows that go from the floor to the ceiling.

• One possibility to reconfigure a building's lighting is the installation of full-pane windows.

• One possibility to a building's lighting is the installation of full-pane windows.

Investment in such improvements and betterments should be a natural choice for businesses.

• NO CHANGE

• Investment in such improvements should be a natural and clear choice for businesses.

• Investment in such improvements and betterments should be a natural choice and obvious choice for businesses.

• Investment in such improvements should be a natural choice for businesses.