Descriptive Writing

Which is the better description?

• The noise of the amplifiers growled like lions about to take their prey.

• I could feel the thud from the amplifiers like an extra heart-beat.

• The amplifiers began to thud very loudly.

Which is the better description?

• The atmosphere in the stadium was electric.

• Everybody in the stadium was waiting in anticipation and excitement.

• It started with a chant which quickly grew to a roar. The swathe of colour that surrounded the stadium rose and began to stamp their feet in unison.

Which technique has been used here: 'As I glanced over the never-ending sea of vehicles, my eyes fell upon the pea-green Nissan Micra that was marooned next to us.'

• Extended metaphor

• Personification

• Simile

• Show not tell

Which is the better description?

• Irene knelt on the riverbank, coughing and bedraggled, and her face began to turn a blotchy shade of purple.

• Irene looked mortified and embarrassed. She couldn't believe what had happened.

• Irene looked as though she had nearly drowned. She looked terrible.

Which technique has been used here? 'The sensation of wanting to run away was so strong but I was a fly stuck in a gigantic cobweb.'

• Metaphor

• Simile

• Personification

• Sensory imagery

Which technique has been used here? 'Boom! My head jerked back as an arc of green and orange sick spewed out of my mouth like a military missile.'

• Simile

• Metaphor

• Personification

• Extended metaphor

Which technique has been used here? - 'The irresistible aroma of beer and hot dogs fuelled my hunger for the match.'

• Personification

• Sensory imagery

• Enjambment

• Alliteration

Which is the better descrption?

• Splash! I fell like into the pool and sunk like a brick.

• That's when my friend pushed me and I fell, head first, into the deep end of the pool.

• I felt Tom's palms, heavy on my chest, and, before I could register what was happening, my ankle began to twist and give way.

Which technique has been used here? 'His red eyes were bulging and bloodshot behind his thick-rimmed, perfectly square spectacles.'

• Anecdote

• Personification

• Sensory imagery

• Zoom in on detail

Which technique has been used here? - 'What was wrong with me? Why couldn't I just get on with it like everybody else? For goodness sake, Lily, get a grip.'

• Anecdote

• Internal thoughts

• Sensory imagery

• Extended metaphor