Hit or Miss?

"I am sorry..that must have hurt!"

• Hit! :)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

Empathy Miss #1 : Sympathy vs Empathy

•Responds with sympathy

•Feeling for instead of feeling with.

"Oh! I felt exactly the same way. Me too!"

• Hit :)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

This is one example of an empathy hit! relating to what one is sharing and just connecting with the same emotions of the experience.

"Oh no, you didn't! If I were you, I would just have died, it would have been so horrible.."

• Hit :)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

Empathy Miss #2 :

The Gasp and Awe

•Feels shame on your behalf

•Tells you how horrified you should be

•You end up feeling like you need to make that person feel better!

"Never thought you would have done it that way, thought you would have aced it..what happened actually?"

• Hit:)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

Empathy Miss #3: The Mighty Fall

•Sees you as perfect

•Feels disappointed or let down by your imperfections

"How did you let this happen? What were you thinking!!"

• Hit :)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

Empathy Miss #4: The Block and Tackle

•Uncomfortable with vulnerability

•Criticises you instead, or find someone to be angry at for you

"Oh my! How could he be like that? He really needs to stop this, I feel so upset with him!"

• Hit :)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

Empathy Miss #4: The Block and Tackle

•Uncomfortable with vulnerability

•Criticises you instead, or find someone to be angry at for you

"But it can't be thatttt bad. You are amazing and have always been. I think you are overthinking it, it will be fine!"

• Hit :)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

Empathy Miss #5: The Boots and Shovel

•Trying desperately to make it better so they can be more comfortable dealing with it.

•Not hearing you

"Oh yes! i felt it too! For me, it happened just like that, only worse. I remember...."

• Hit :)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

Empathy Miss #6: If you think that’s bad….

•Trying to compare and compete on who has it worst

•Shifting the focus to him/herself

"I feel you, do you want to tell me more?"

• Hit :)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

This is an empathy hit! you are trying to connect with the experience and allow the person to share with you.

"You felt like it was not fair right? Yes, I heard you! Can I help with anything?"

• Hit :)

• Miss :(

Answer explanation

This is an empathy hit! You are clarifying what he/she is saying and paying attention to what was being shared. Letting him/her know that you are here for him/her. Not necessary to always provide solutions.