English I Revising and Editing

Answer the following question based on this paragraph:

(1) Everyone has wants and needs that cost money. (2) Some people want the independence that comes with having a car, and some want the latest technology or the newest fashions. (3) Others need to help with the family finances. (4) Working during the school year might sound impossible because of school work and other activities. (5) Additionally, most students have three months without school, during which they could work. (6) Yet, since 1990, the number of teens with summer jobs has steadily declined year after year. (7) This means teens are not earning money for themselves and are not learning important life skills. (8) I plan to get a job this summer.

Justine would like to use a more appropriate transition in sentence 5. Which of the following is the best replacement for Additionally?

• Therefore

• However

• For Example

• Finally

Answer the following question based on this paragraph:

(1) Everyone has wants and needs that cost money. (2) Some people want the independence that comes with having a car, and some want the latest technology or the newest fashions. (3) Others need to help with the family finances. (4) Working during the school year might sound impossible because of school work and other activities. (5) Additionally, most students have three months without school, during which they could work. (6) Yet, since 1990, the number of teens with summer jobs has steadily declined year after year. (7) This means teens are not earning money for themselves and are not learning important life skills. (8) I plan to get a job this summer.

Justine has not effectively stated the position she is taking int his paper. Which of the following could best replace sentence 8 and provide a stronger position statement for Justine's paper?

• Don't you think so?

• I am troubled that more students do not wok during the summer.

• Some students think summer is about recovering from the stress of the school year.

• I believe more teens should spend their summers working to earn money and secure their futures.

What is the best way to combine the following sentences:

For example, the minimum wage in Texas is $7.25 per hour. At this rate, a $100 pair of jeans would take almost 14 hours of work to earn.

• For example, at the minimum wage of $7.25 per hour, a $100 pair of jeans would take almost 14 hours of work to earn.

• The minimum wage is $7.25 per hour, and earning $100 pair of jeans would take almost 14 hours of work.

• For example, the minimum wage is $7.25 per hour, a $100 pair of jeans would take almost 14 hours of work to earn.

• A $100 pair of jeans would take almost 14 hours to earn, and the minimum wage is $7.25 per hour.

Use the following sentences to answer the question.

(21) Working outside builds physical skills and exposes teens to a different kind of work environment than working indoors does. (22) Since adults spend much of their lives at work, knowing this will always be valuable.

Justine wants to use a more appropriate word than this in sentence 22. Which phrase could best replace the word this?

• how to work outside

• about different work situations

• where to find a job

• what is common for teens

Use the following sentences to answer the question.

(23) A summer job also gives teens a chance to learn responsibility. (24) Suppose your school offers a trip to Rome during spring break. (25) You want to go, but your parents aren't convinced you are mature enough to travel without them. (26) What better way to prove to them that you can handle the trip than by taking a summer job? (27) A worker has to be on time, do everything that is asked, and even find more work if the workday is slow.

Justine whats to add the following idea to sentences 23-27.

You can earn money for the trip while establishing that you are mature and responsible.

Re-read the paragraph carefully. What is the most effective place to add this sentence?

• Before sentence 23

• After sentence 24

• Before sentence 26

• After sentence 27

What is the most effective way to combine the following sentences:

Look through an image gallery of deep-sea creatures. You might think you are looking at stills for a science fiction film.

• Look thought an image gallery of deep-sea creatures, you might think you are looking at stills from a science fiction film.

• When you look through an image gallery of deep-sea creature, you might think you are looking at stills from a science fiction film.

• Looking through an image gallery, you might think deep-sea creatures are looking at stills from a science fiction film.

• An image gallery of deep-sea creatures, when looked through by you, might make you think you are looking at stills from a science fiction film.

What is the most effective revision to make in the following sentence:

In a dive being led by senior scientist Bruce Robison, he came across the 9-centimeter-long fish in Monterey Bay.

• In a dive, led by senior scientist Bruce Robison, the 9-centimeter-long fish was found in Monterey Bay.

• In a dive, which was being led by senior scientist Bruce Robison, the 9-centimeter-long fish in Monterey Bay.

• Senior scientist Bruce Robison came across 9-centimeter-long fish while leading a dive in Monterey Bay.

• Senior scientist Bruce Robison, leading a dive in Monterey Bay, he came across the 9-centimiter-long fish.

What change should be made in the following sentence:

On the morning of our first agility trial, as we made the long drive to the fairground, I sat in the backseat with Gidget, petting her and remembering all the time we have spent preparing for this day.

• change morning to Morning

• Change sat to set

• Change have spent to had spent

• Insert a comma after preparing

What change should be made in the following sentence:

Sometimes, when we were learning a new obstacle, she would behave timid at first.

• Change Sometimes to Sometime

• Change were learning to will have learned

• Change timid to timidly

• Change at first to firstly

What change is needed in the following sentence:

I imagined all the other competitors raving about Gideget's skill and speed on the course, and my amazing handling abilitys.

• Change imagined to imagining

• Change Gidget's to Gidgets

• Change course to coarse

• Change abilitys to abilities