Revising and Editing

In sentence 5, the word trip is not the appropriate word to use. Which of the following should replace trip in this sentence?

• standard

• process

• operation

• journey

Joe would like to replace sentence 8 with a sentence that better articulates the thesis of his paper. Which of the following will accomplish this goal?

• Surfing requires just the right equipment, careful observation of the waves, and the patience to perfect a difficult skill.

• Surfing certainly requires specific materials, identified waves, and various personality traits.

• Surfing requires people who are willing to think about the equipment, the waves, and their own personality traits.

• Surfing requires people who care about the materials used, waves seen, and variety of personality traits represented.

Joe thinks he may have included an extraneous idea in the second paragraph (sentences 9–16). Which sentence, if any, should he delete from this paragraph?

• Sentence 12

• Sentence 13

• Sentence 15

• No sentence should be deleted from this paragraph.

What is the most effective way to revise sentence 21?

• These are called breaks, and when surfers find one, they paddle their surfboards out into it and patiently wait for the perfect wave.

• These are called breaks, and when surfers find one, they paddle their surfboards out into it because of the perfect wave they patiently wait for.

• These are called breaks, and when surfers find one, they paddle their surfboards out into it, they patiently wait for the perfect wave.

• Sentence 21 does not need to be revised.

What is the most effective way to revise sentence 30?

• With more than 500 miles of coastline, people in their home state are offered ample opportunity to surf right here in Texas.

• With more than 500 miles of coastline, Texas offers ample opportunity for people to surf right here in their home state

• With more than 500 miles of coastline, there is ample opportunity for people to surf right here in their home state and in Texas.

• With more than 500 miles of coastline, ample opportunity is offered for people in Texas to surf right here in their home state.