Banks wondered if breadfruit trees could be grown successfully in other hot places, like Jamaica. As the years passed, he became more important in scientific circles. He was a Fellow of the Society of Antiquities, a Trustee of the British Museum, and an adviser to the Royal Botanic Gardens, a position to which he was appointed by King George III. By 1787, he had enough influence to organize a voyage to Tahiti to collect some breadfruit trees. The breadfruit trees would be delivered as ship's cargo to Jamaica. Banks's duties in England prevented him from going on the voyage, but he had confidence that his friend Captain Bligh was able to carry out the project productively. It was not to be, however. Captain Bligh's ship, the Bounty, became the scene of one of the most famous revolts of all time. The crew disliked Captain Bligh and resents having to care for the young breadfruit trees. Taking over the Bounty, they set Captain Bligh and his few loyal men adrift in a small boat in the Pacific Ocean, expecting them to drown or die of thirst. Amazingly, after forty-seven days on the open sea, Bligh succeeded in guiding his men to a safe harbor. In spite of the captains agonizing experience, he still wanted to be the one to transport breadfruit trees to Jamaica. In 1793, he finally succeeded in taking those trees. When Banks died twenty-seven years later, on June 19, 1820, it was with the satisfaction of knowing that his dream of bringing breadfruit to the Americas had come true. Several films offer more information and entertainment concerning Captain Bligh's voyage. The 1935 movie classic Mutiny on the Bounty,starring Clark Gable and Charles Laughton, is about the events that took place on this ill fated voyage. Anthony Hopkins and Mel Gibson star in the 1984 version,The Bounty.

How is Bligh was able to carry correctly written?

Banks wondered if breadfruit trees could be grown successfully in other hot places, like Jamaica. As the years passed, he became more important in scientific circles. He was a Fellow of the Society of Antiquities, a Trustee of the British Museum, and an adviser to the Royal Botanic Gardens, a position to which he was appointed by King George III. By 1787, he had enough influence to organize a voyage to Tahiti to collect some breadfruit trees. The breadfruit trees would be delivered as ship's cargo to Jamaica. Banks's duties in England prevented him from going on the voyage, but he had confidence that his friend Captain Bligh was able to carry out the project productively. It was not to be, however. Captain Bligh's ship, the Bounty, became the scene of one of the most famous revolts of all time. The crew disliked Captain Bligh and resents having to care for the young breadfruit trees. Taking over the Bounty, they set Captain Bligh and his few loyal men adrift in a small boat in the Pacific Ocean, expecting them to drown or die of thirst. Amazingly, after forty-seven days on the open sea, Bligh succeeded in guiding his men to a safe harbor. In spite of the captains agonizing experience, he still wanted to be the one to transport breadfruit trees to Jamaica. In 1793, he finally succeeded in taking those trees. When Banks died twenty-seven years later, on June 19, 1820, it was with the satisfaction of knowing that his dream of bringing breadfruit to the Americas had come true. Several films offer more information and entertainment concerning Captain Bligh's voyage. The 1935 movie classic Mutiny on the Bounty,starring Clark Gable and Charles Laughton, is about the events that took place on this ill fated voyage. Anthony Hopkins and Mel Gibson star in the 1984 version,The Bounty.

How is and resents correctly written?

Banks wondered if breadfruit trees could be grown successfully in other hot places, like Jamaica. As the years passed, he became more important in scientific circles. He was a Fellow of the Society of Antiquities, a Trustee of the British Museum, and an adviser to the Royal Botanic Gardens, a position to which he was appointed by King George III. By 1787, he had enough influence to organize a voyage to Tahiti to collect some breadfruit trees. The breadfruit trees would be delivered as ship's cargo to Jamaica. Banks's duties in England prevented him from going on the voyage, but he had confidence that his friend Captain Bligh was able to carry out the project productively. It was not to be, however. Captain Bligh's ship, the Bounty, became the scene of one of the most famous revolts of all time. The crew disliked Captain Bligh and resents having to care for the young breadfruit trees. Taking over the Bounty, they set Captain Bligh and his few loyal men adrift in a small boat in the Pacific Ocean, expecting them to drown or die of thirst. Amazingly, after forty-seven days on the open sea, Bligh succeeded in guiding his men to a safe harbor. In spite of the captains agonizing experience, he still wanted to be the one to transport breadfruit trees to Jamaica. In 1793, he finally succeeded in taking those trees. When Banks died twenty-seven years later, on June 19, 1820, it was with the satisfaction of knowing that his dream of bringing breadfruit to the Americas had come true. Several films offer more information and entertainment concerning Captain Bligh's voyage. The 1935 movie classic Mutiny on the Bounty,starring Clark Gable and Charles Laughton, is about the events that took place on this ill fated voyage. Anthony Hopkins and Mel Gibson star in the 1984 version,The Bounty.

How is they set Captain correctly written?

Here are two drafts of the first part of Keisha's paper.

DRAFT A

Joseph Banks was born in England in 1743. Even at a young age, he was fascinated by the rich variety of plants that nature produced. From his tutor, Banks learned how to collect, group, and name plants. With this knowledge at his disposal, he could not be stopped. His knowledge grew, and in 1766 he made his first long trip as a naturalist. Sailing through the waters of Newfoundland and Labrador, Banks collected, pressed, dried, and labeled many plants he had never seen before. Banks's work won the respect of other scientists; soon after his return to England, he was invited to join a group of scholars called the Royal Society. Partly through his new connections, Banks was able to join an expedition led by the great sea explorer Captain Cook. The Royal Society was founded in 1660, almost 350 years ago. The long sea voyage took Banks around the world. One of his most exciting plant discoveries was the breadfruit tree of Tahiti. Grains such as wheat did not grow well in hot, moist places like Tahiti, but filling, delicious breadfruit was a good substitute for bread.

DRAFT B

In England in the mid-1700s, botany, the study of plants, was still in its early stages. Many of the people of the day would have laughed at the idea that the study of plants could be a valuable science. Plants and flowers were considered a suitable hobby for women, and not much more. To a young man named Joseph Banks, however, plants were so fascinating that he decided to brave society's disapproval. Banks was disappointed to learn that his school, Oxford University, had no courses about plants, but he was not one to give up easily. He hired a private tutor who taught him a recently invented system for collecting, grouping, and naming plants. In 1766, Banks made his first long ocean voyage as a naturalist. At the end of this voyage, Banks published his extensive notes. Banks's work attracted the attention of other scientific minds back in England. He became a respected scholar. His new prestige gave Banks the opportunity to go on several other sea voyages, including one that took him around the world. Banks was exposed to many new kinds of plants on these voyages. One of the plants that Joseph Banks saw on his voyage was the breadfruit tree that impressed him. Apparently, the fruit of the breadfruit tree is quite delicious and filling, not only feeling like fresh bread but also tasting like it.

Question 5

Keisha wants to rewrite this sentence from paragraph 2 of Draft B: One of the plants that Joseph Banks saw on his voyage was the breadfruit tree that impressed him.

How can Keisha best rewrite this sentence to make it clearer without changing the meaning?

Read the next part of Joaquin's rough draft. This section has groups of underlined words. The questions ask about these groups of underlined words.

As millions of fans know, Star Wars is about a young man, Luke Skywalker who becomes a Jedi knight and leads rebel forces in a war against an evil empire. However, George Lucas's early drafts were very different from the final version. At one point, the smuggler Han Solo would be going to be a green-skinned alien with gills.

When the filming began, it was plagued with endless problems, including a tight budget and an unrealistic schedule. The movie was being shot in the Tunisian desert, which was freezing cold at night, insufferably hot during the day, and often prone to sandstorms. Some of the actors had to deal with uncomfortable costumes as well. For example, British actor Anthony Daniels lost an average of four pounds a day through perspiration, the result of wearing his robot costume in the desert heat.

When the film was finally completed, 20th Century Fox was nervous. Producer Gary Kurtz had advertised the film at various science fiction conventions, but the studio had not done much else to promote it. Even Lucas's friends were skeptical about the film. One of the few friends who liked it was Steven Spielberg, who predicted Star Wars would make a fortune.

Spielberg was right. On opening night, long lines formed outside theaters. People who had seen Star Wars advertised at conventions had done something Fox had not expected: spread the word to the general public.Star Wars had the most big and exciting opening weekend of any film that had preceded it, and that was only the beginning. Since that first movie, several Star Wars movies have been released, and fans keep clamoring for more.

Question 6

How is young man, Luke Skywalker correctly written?

Read the next part of Joaquin's rough draft. This section has groups of underlined words. The questions ask about these groups of underlined words.

As millions of fans know, Star Wars is about a young man, Luke Skywalkerwho becomes a Jedi knight and leads rebel forces in a war against an evil empire. However, George Lucas's early drafts were very different from the final version. At one point, the smuggler Han Solo would be going to be a green-skinned alien with gills.

When the filming began, it was plagued with endless problems, including a tight budget and an unrealistic schedule. The movie was being shot in the Tunisian desert, which was freezing cold at night, insufferably hot during the day, and often prone to sandstorms. Some of the actors had to deal with uncomfortable costumes as well. For example, British actor Anthony Daniels lost an average of four pounds a day through perspiration, the result of wearing his robot costume in the desert heat.

When the film was finally completed, 20th Century Fox was nervous. Producer Gary Kurtz had advertised the film at various science fiction conventions, but the studio had not done much else to promote it. Even Lucas's friends were skeptical about the film. One of the few friends who liked it was Steven Spielberg, who predicted Star Wars would make a fortune.

Spielberg was right. On opening night, long lines formed outside theaters. People who had seen Star Wars advertised at conventions had done something Fox had not expected: spread the word to the general public.Star Wars had the most big and exciting opening weekend of any film that had preceded it, and that was only the beginning. Since that first movie, several Star Wars movies have been released, and fans keep clamoring for more.

How is would be going to be correctly written?

Read the next part of Joaquin's rough draft. This section has groups of underlined words. The questions ask about these groups of underlined words.

As millions of fans know, Star Wars is about a young man, Luke Skywalkerwho becomes a Jedi knight and leads rebel forces in a war against an evil empire. However, George Lucas's early drafts were very different from the final version. At one point, the smuggler Han Solo would be going to be a green-skinned alien with gills.

When the filming began, it was plagued with endless problems, including a tight budget and an unrealistic schedule. The movie was being shot in the Tunisian desert, which was freezing cold at night, insufferably hot during the day, and often prone to sandstorms. Some of the actors had to deal with uncomfortable costumes as well. For example, British actor Anthony Daniels lost an average of four pounds a day through perspiration, the result of wearing his robot costume in the desert heat.

When the film was finally completed, 20th Century Fox was nervous. Producer Gary Kurtz had advertised the film at various science fiction conventions, but the studio had not done much else to promote it. Even Lucas's friends were skeptical about the film. One of the few friends who liked it was Steven Spielberg, who predicted Star Wars would make a fortune.

Spielberg was right. On opening night, long lines formed outside theaters. People who had seen Star Wars advertised at conventions had done something Fox had not expected: spread the word to the general public.Star Wars had the most big and exciting opening weekend of any film that had preceded it, and that was only the beginning. Since that first movie, several Star Wars movies have been released, and fans keep clamoring for more.

How is freezing cold at night, insufferably hot during the day, and often prone to sandstorms correctly written?

Joaquin's media teacher asks the students to write a paper on an influential event in American filmmaking. Joaquin decides to write about Star Wars.

Here are two drafts of the first part of Joaquin's paper.

DRAFT A

Twenty-five years ago, the original Star Wars movie was produced. It introduced us to things we had never seen before in a movie. It was the first movie of its kind. It broke box-office records and earned seven Academy Awards.

In 1977, something happened that would change moviemaking forever: the film Star Wars was released in theaters. It mixed action and special effects. It captured the imaginations of viewers everywhere. The movie's phenomenal success led many studios to try to copy its exciting plot and sophisticated visual effects. Incredibly, no one in Hollywood had expected the film to amount to much.

How did this beloved film come to be? The answer can be summed up in two words: George Lucas. A film-school graduate, Lucas directed a flop after graduating but soon afterward redeemed himself with a box-office success. Lucas indicated that the script he wrote for the movie studio was partly inspired by the old movies he loved as a child. A movie studio then offered Lucas some money to develop a script.

DRAFT B

Twenty-five years ago, the original Star Wars movie was produced. Long before computer animation in films, it introduced viewers to good robots, aliens, and heroes who wield light sabers. The first of its kind, the film broke box-office records and earned seven Academy Awards.

Although the first Star Wars film had suffered the twin ills of a low budget and a chaotic shooting schedule during its production phase, nothing was uncertain about the film's release. To say that it was successful is a gross understatement of its success and does not even begin to describe the success of the film. From the beginning, Star Wars became intimately interwoven with the fabric of popular culture. Some film critics even go so far as to say that the current Hollywood trend of producing big blockbusters originated with Star Wars. To comprehend the significance of the film, we must begin by investigating the forces behind the film, particularly its creator, George Lucas.

As a boy, Lucas loved to watch movie after movie. He was captivated by their swashbuckling heroes, evil villains, and damsels in distress. These images stayed with him as he embarked on his filmmaking career. In 1972, Lucas, a graduate of the University of Southern California's film school, directed American Graffiti.His second feature film and his first box office success. Because of American Graffiti, 20th Century Fox, the movie studio, was willing to take a chance on Lucas's next idea. They offered him $15,000 to develop a script.

Question 9

In paragraph 2 of Draft A, how can Joaquin best combine these sentences without changing their meaning: It mixed action and special effects. It captured the imaginations of viewers everywhere.?

Joaquin's media teacher asks the students to write a paper on an influential event in American filmmaking. Joaquin decides to write about Star Wars.

Here are two drafts of the first part of Joaquin's paper.

DRAFT A

Twenty-five years ago, the original Star Wars movie was produced. It introduced us to things we had never seen before in a movie. It was the first movie of its kind. It broke box-office records and earned seven Academy Awards.

In 1977, something happened that would change moviemaking forever: the film Star Wars was released in theaters. It mixed action and special effects. It captured the imaginations of viewers everywhere. The movie's phenomenal success led many studios to try to copy its exciting plot and sophisticated visual effects. Incredibly, no one in Hollywood had expected the film to amount to much.

How did this beloved film come to be? The answer can be summed up in two words: George Lucas. A film-school graduate, Lucas directed a flop after graduating but soon afterward redeemed himself with a box-office success. Lucas indicated that the script he wrote for the movie studio was partly inspired by the old movies he loved as a child. A movie studio then offered Lucas some money to develop a script.

DRAFT B

Twenty-five years ago, the original Star Wars movie was produced. Long before computer animation in films, it introduced viewers to good robots, aliens, and heroes who wield light sabers. The first of its kind, the film broke box-office records and earned seven Academy Awards.

Although the first Star Wars film had suffered the twin ills of a low budget and a chaotic shooting schedule during its production phase, nothing was uncertain about the film's release. To say that it was successful is a gross understatement of its success and does not even begin to describe the success of the film. From the beginning, Star Wars became intimately interwoven with the fabric of popular culture. Some film critics even go so far as to say that the current Hollywood trend of producing big blockbusters originated with Star Wars. To comprehend the significance of the film, we must begin by investigating the forces behind the film, particularly its creator, George Lucas.

As a boy, Lucas loved to watch movie after movie. He was captivated by their swashbuckling heroes, evil villains, and damsels in distress. These images stayed with him as he embarked on his filmmaking career. In 1972, Lucas, a graduate of the University of Southern California's film school, directed American Graffiti.His second feature film and his first box office success. Because of American Graffiti, 20th Century Fox, the movie studio, was willing to take a chance on Lucas's next idea. They offered him $15,000 to develop a script.

In which sentence from Draft B does Joaquin needlessly repeat information already given in the sentence?

Read the next part of Lu's rough draft. This section has groups of underlined words. The questions ask about these groups of underlined words.

(21)The Buffalo Soldiers were also called upon to protect the rights of the Native American (First American) inhabitants of the territory, known as "Indian Territory" prior to statehood.(22)In Oklahoma, early settlers' who illegally entered Indian land were known as "Sooners."(23)The American government was comitted to expelling them.(24)The Buffalo Soldiers were given the task of pushing the Sooners back into Kansas and to keep them out.(25)Similarly, timber mills built by dishonest businessmen seeking wealth would mysteriously appear on Indian land.(26)They supplied lumber to the people settling along the frontier.(27)At this time, the cavalry units were the primary law enforcement in the territory, so their job was very important.(28)The Buffalo Soldiers tried their best to keep the peace.

(29)The Buffalo Soldiers signed up for five-year terms of service and in return received room and board, clothing, and thirteen dollars a month.(30)Serving in difficult conditions, they never knew for certain where they would be sent.(31)Since they performed the tasks of engineer s, construction workers, and police officers, they gained the respect of military leaders and civilians alike.(32)The Buffalo Soldiers performed their tasks affectively, and by the 1890s they represented one-fifth of the entire military West of the Mississippi River.(33)They left a legacy of achievement and astounding adaptability that still inspires people today.

Question 11

In sentence 23, how is comitted correctly written?

Read the next part of Lu's rough draft. This section has groups of underlined words. The questions ask about these groups of underlined words.

(21)The Buffalo Soldiers were also called upon to protect the rights of the Native American (First American) inhabitants of the territory, known as "Indian Territory" prior to statehood.(22)In Oklahoma, early settlers' who illegally entered Indian land were known as "Sooners."(23)The American government was comitted to expelling them.(24)The Buffalo Soldiers were given the task of pushing the Sooners back into Kansas and to keep them out.(25)Similarly, timber mills built by dishonest businessmen seeking wealth would mysteriously appear on Indian land.(26)They supplied lumber to the people settling along the frontier.(27)At this time, the cavalry units were the primary law enforcement in the territory, so their job was very important.(28)The Buffalo Soldiers tried their best to keep the peace.

(29)The Buffalo Soldiers signed up for five-year terms of service and in return received room and board, clothing, and thirteen dollars a month.(30)Serving in difficult conditions, they never knew for certain where they would be sent.(31)Since they performed the tasks of engineer s, construction workers, and police officers, they gained the respect of military leaders and civilians alike.(32)The Buffalo Soldiers performed their tasks affectively, and by the 1890s they represented one-fifth of the entire military West of the Mississippi River.(33)They left a legacy of achievement and astounding adaptability that still inspires people today.

Question 12

In sentence 24, how is pushing the Sooners back into Kansas and to keep them out correctly written?

Read the next part of Lu's rough draft. This section has groups of underlined words. The questions ask about these groups of underlined words.

(21)The Buffalo Soldiers were also called upon to protect the rights of the Native American (First American) inhabitants of the territory, known as "Indian Territory" prior to statehood.(22)In Oklahoma, early settlers' who illegally entered Indian land were known as "Sooners."(23)The American government was comitted to expelling them.(24)The Buffalo Soldiers were given the task of pushing the Sooners back into Kansas and to keep them out.(25)Similarly, timber mills built by dishonest businessmen seeking wealth would mysteriously appear on Indian land.(26)They supplied lumber to the people settling along the frontier.(27)At this time, the cavalry units were the primary law enforcement in the territory, so their job was very important.(28)The Buffalo Soldiers tried their best to keep the peace.

(29)The Buffalo Soldiers signed up for five-year terms of service and in return received room and board, clothing, and thirteen dollars a month.(30)Serving in difficult conditions, they never knew for certain where they would be sent.(31)Since they performed the tasks of engineer s, construction workers, and police officers, they gained the respect of military leaders and civilians alike.(32)The Buffalo Soldiers performed their tasks affectively, and by the 1890s they represented one-fifth of the entire military West of the Mississippi River.(33)They left a legacy of achievement and astounding adaptability that still inspires people today.

Question 13

In sentence 32, how is West of the Mississippi correctly written?

Read this next section of Caleb's rough draft. This section has groups of underlined words. The questions ask about these groups of underlined words.

In 1983, Mankiller was elected deputy chief of the Cherokee Nation. She served under its chief, Ross Swimmer, much as a vice president serves under a president. As the leaders of the Cherokee Nation, Swimmer and Mankiller was responsible for all official business and special programs.

Two years later, the President of the United States asked Chief Swimmer to run the Bureau of Indian affairs in Washington, D.C. When Chief Swimmer agreed, Wilma Mankiller became the Cherokee Nation's first woman chief, a position she held for ten years. Mankiller filled the role of chief with great effectiveness. She continued to work for social and economic opportunities for her people. She also take steps to prevent the Cherokee language and culture from slipping away by establishing the Institute for Cherokee Literacy and the Cherokee Heritage Center. Mankiller's hard work and dedication had paid off, improving thousands of Cherokees' lives.

Question 14

Which of these sentences repeats information already given in the sentence?

In 1983, Mankiller was elected deputy chief of the Cherokee Nation. She served under its chief, Ross Swimmer, much as a vice president serves under a president. As the leaders of the Cherokee Nation, Swimmer and Mankiller was responsible for all official business and special programs.

Two years later, the President of the United States asked Chief Swimmer to run the Bureau of Indian affairs in Washington, D.C. When Chief Swimmer agreed, Wilma Mankiller became the Cherokee Nation's first woman chief, a position she held for ten years. Mankiller filled the role of chief with great effectiveness. She continued to work for social and economic opportunitiesfor her people. She also take steps to prevent the Cherokee language and culture from slipping away by establishing the Institute for Cherokee Literacy and the Cherokee Heritage Center. Mankiller's hard work and dedication had paid off, improving thousands of Cherokees' lives.

Question 15

In paragraph 1 of Draft B, how can Caleb best combine the sentences Her family lived in Oklahoma. They lived on a farm, so Mankiller grew up in a simple wooden farmhouse her father had built. without changing their meaning?