Fifty million Elvis fans can’t be wrong.

Technology’s advancing too fast. First iPhones, then brain chips, then it’s the Matrix scenario and we’ll be bowing to robot overlords.

Same-sex marriage is wrong because marriage is a bond between a man and a woman.

Either you let me go to the concert, or I’ll be miserable for the rest of my life.

Opium induces sleep because it has a soporific quality.

Rush Limbaugh is an idiot; you can’t believe a word he says.

All jackasses have long ears. My ex is a jackass. Therefore, my ex has long ears.

The doctor on TV said that the side effects were negligible.

We shouldn’t change the Red Skins team name. I mean, financially it’s an unsound goal, and we really ought to redesign the uniforms.

James is a good person because he’s awesome.

If you’re not for us, you’re against us.

The last three dates she had were awful. She’s not dating anymore, because it’s a horrible activity.

I got sick after my flu shot. I’m never getting one again, because they make me sick.

Ben was part of a convict rehabilitation program while he was in prison, but the day after he got out of jail he robbed a liquor store. Obviously those programs don't work.

Don't trust that man. He never does the dishes.

The student's paper argued that we can: "End starvation by feeding the hungry." What fallacy did the student commit?

You want to raise the minimum wage? I don't agree! You want to give handouts rather than making people work for a living. I bet you think I should give homeless people money out of my own pocket, too!

When I saw the politician standing in front of the Tomb of the Unknown Solider, I was so moved that I voted for that politician.

Every time to rooster crows, the suns comes up. The rooster must be very powerful and important, since it makes the sun rise.