Worksheets5.11 (B)(C) Revise
Total questions: 5
Worksheet time: 3mins
Sam Walton
K. Reiter
The grammatical errors in this passage are intentional.
Ryan wrote a paper about Sam Walton, the man who founded Walmart. Read Ryan’s paper and look for revisions he needs to make. Then answer the questions that follow.
(1) Sam Walton was born in 1918 in Kingfisher, Oklahoma. (2) In 1940, Walton attended the University of Missouri. (3) He graduated with a degree in economics. (4) In 1945, he opened his own Ben Franklin variety store. (5) The store was known as a five-and-dime store. (6) In 1950, Walton relocated the store to Bentonville, Arkansas. (7) In 1962, Sam opened the first Walmart store in Rogers, Arkansas. (8) The store offered a wide range of merchandise at a discounted price. (9) Most of his stores were in small towns. (10) He believed that even small towns needed discount stores. (11) My mom and I buy groceries at Walmart every Friday. (12) By 1985, there were more than 800 stores across the country. (13) Walmart has become one of the largest corporations in the world. (14) Sam Walton died in 1921. (15) His family still manages the successful business.
Which is the best way to combine sentences 2 and 3?
In 1940, Walton attended the University of Missouri, so he graduated with a degree in economics.
In 1940, Walton attended the University of Missouri and graduated with a degree in economics.
In 1940, Walton attended the University of Missouri because he graduated with a degree in economics.
In 1940, Walton attended the University of Missouri, he graduated with a degree in economics.
Roald Dahl
K. Reiter Carissa is writing a paper about her favorite author. She wrote a paper about Roald Dahl. Read Carissa’s paper and look for revisions she needs to make. Then answer the questions that follow.
(1) Roald Dahl is a best-selling children’s author. (2) He wrote Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Matilda. (3) He has written other books such as The BFG, Boy, and James and the Giant Peach. (4) Many of them were made into movies. (5) Roald Dahl was born in 1913 in Llandaff, Wales. (6) He attended a boarding school when he was young. (7) He recounted the events that occurred while at the school in his book, Boy. (8) While at the school, the students were invited to try different chocolate bars which inspired Chocolate and the Chocolate Factory. (9) After graduating, Roald traveled and then enlisted in the Royal Air Force. (10) In 1953, he married an actress names Patricia Neal, and they had five children together. (11) After 30 years, they divorced, and he married Felicity Crosland. (12) In 1961, the author wrote James and the Giant Peach and several screen plays. (13) He went on to publish Danny the Champion of the World and My Uncle Oswald. (14) Roald Dahl died on November 23, 1990. (15) He was 74 years old.
Which change can Carissa make to improve the clarity in sentence 4?
No revision is needed in this sentence.
Change them to his books
Change were to are
Change Many to A Few
My Visit to Disney World
K. Reiter
The grammatical errors in this passage are intentional.
Natalie wrote a paper about her experience at Disney World. Read Natalie’s paper and look for revisions she needs to make. Then answer the questions that follow.
My Visit to Disney World
(1) I had the best experience at Disney World. (2) There were so many fun rides and things to do. (3) Seeing all the Disney characters throughout the park was one of my favorite memories. (4) I took selfies with the characters and shared with my friends. (5) I have over 300 followers. (6) Besides taking pictures with the different characters, I rode many of the rides. (7) One of my favorite rides was the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad. (8) It wasn’t very scary. (9) I enjoyed going through the dark tunnels. (10) I rode the Kali River Rapids with my family. (11) My brother got soaking wet! (12) I got rocky road with chocolate sprinkles. (13) My mom took silly pictures of all of us with our Mickey Mouse ears on. (14) It is a vacation I will always remember.
Which transition is best to add to the beginning of sentence 13?
Soon
After all
However
Finally
Letter
K. Reiter
Maverick wrote this letter to his principal. Read the letter and look for corrections and revisions that Maverick needs to make. Then answer the questions that follow.
Dear Principal Wiseman,
(1) As you know, the students at Whitt Intermediate School work hard every day to be successful. (2) We sit in class for hours listening to our teachers and focusing on our work. (3) Therefore, we do not get a chance to move around and visit with our friends. (4) We need a short recess after lunch to refocus and prepare for the remainder of the day.
(5) Recess is not just for elementary students. (6) Even adults need time to stretch and move around. (7) Studies show that it’s not healthy to sit all day. (8) It makes it difficult to focus on our work. (9) In elementary school, we had recess every day and now as fifth graders, we aren’t allotted time to enjoy the great outdoors and take a break.
(10) I understand that learning is important and the time we spend in class is crucial. (11) Instead of taking time away from learning, I propose that the lunch period is shortening by 15 minutes. (12) The students finish their meal in about 20 minutes anyway. (13) Then, as you know, the cafeteria gets extremely noisy because everyone starts talking and wanting to move around. (14) Causing trouble, we could go outside and enjoy the fresh air and catch up with friends before heading back to class. (15) If we go outside, the cafeteria workers would not have to worry about keeping the students quiet and seated. (16) It would also allow more time to clean the cafeteria to get ready for dismissal or assemblies.
(17) I hope you will like my proposal. (18) I think the teachers and students would both benefit from allowing 5th and 6th grade students time to destress and enjoy being a kid.
Sincerely,
Maverick Stone
Maverick has not used the appropriate transition at the beginning of sentence 3. Select the word that should replace Therefore in this sentence.
_______________,, we do not get a chance to move around and visit with our friends.
At any rate
Ordinarily
Furthermore
Unfortunately
Letter
K. Reiter
Maverick wrote this letter to his principal. Read the letter and look for corrections and revisions that Maverick needs to make. Then answer the questions that follow.
Dear Principal Wiseman,
(1) As you know, the students at Whitt Intermediate School work hard every day to be successful. (2) We sit in class for hours listening to our teachers and focusing on our work. (3) Therefore, we do not get a chance to move around and visit with our friends. (4) We need a short recess after lunch to refocus and prepare for the remainder of the day.
(5) Recess is not just for elementary students. (6) Even adults need time to stretch and move around. (7) Studies show that it’s not healthy to sit all day. (8) It makes it difficult to focus on our work. (9) In elementary school, we had recess every day and now as fifth graders, we aren’t allotted time to enjoy the great outdoors and take a break.
(10) I understand that learning is important and the time we spend in class is crucial. (11) Instead of taking time away from learning, I propose that the lunch period is shortening by 15 minutes. (12) The students finish their meal in about 20 minutes anyway. (13) Then, as you know, the cafeteria gets extremely noisy because everyone starts talking and wanting to move around. (14) Causing trouble, we could go outside and enjoy the fresh air and catch up with friends before heading back to class. (15) If we go outside, the cafeteria workers would not have to worry about keeping the students quiet and seated. (16) It would also allow more time to clean the cafeteria to get ready for dismissal or assemblies.
(17) I hope you will like my proposal. (18) I think the teachers and students would both benefit from allowing 5th and 6th grade students time to destress and enjoy being a kid.
Sincerely,
Maverick Stone
Maverick wants to replace the word like in sentence 17. Select the BEST word to use in this sentence.
mention
consider
renew
dislike
