Joe is writing a narrative paragraph for his school literary magazine.  He is writing about a character that is learning to perform on a flying trapeze.  Read the draft of the narrative and complete the task that follows.
      Janet held her breath as she watched the student in front of her grab the bar and swing out into the open air on the flying trapeze.  Janet, who had always loved the circus and especially the trapeze artists, had decided months ago to finally take this class to learn the flying trapeze.  As the instructor looked up and gave Janet the "go" signal, she slowly and carefully reached out and grabbed the trapeze bar with her right hand and then her left.  She silently counted to three and then jumped from the platform.  As she flew through the air, she had an awesome feeling.  She loved it.

Joe would like to revise the narrative to include more descriptive sensory language. Select the TWO best phrases to replace the phrase "she had an awesome feeling" in the paragraph.

Which sentences use sensory language to describe the brightness and hotness of the sun?  Select all that apply.

Parker is writing a narrative paragraph for an assignment in his English class about a character running for office.  Read the draft of the narrative and complete the task that follows.

Ricardo put his heart and soul into his campaign to become vice president of the student council.  His posters were the most creative and by far the most memorable.  He worked on his speech for days, constantly making changes to it to make it as perfect as he could get it.  At the school's fall festival, Ricardo set up a booth to promote his campaign.  He gave away buttons, pencils, and candies that bore his campaign slogan, "Vote for Ricardo—the VP you need."  On the day of the election, he waited for the results; he was so nervous.

Parker would like to revise the narrative to include more description of how Ricardo is feeling.  Select the two best phrases to replace the underlined phrase in the paragraph.

What is "sensory language"?

A student is writing a narrative for class about his summer at tennis camp.  The student wants to revise the draft to improve the development of ideas.  Choose one place within the paragraph where more description is needed to better describe the setting.

This past summer I discovered that I am one tough, resilient athlete.  I endured six weeks of tennis camp in Tucson, Arizona, a city notorious for its record–setting temperatures.  It was so hot.  While it would have been nice if there were shades over the tennis courts, sadly there were none.  The sun beat down on me all day long never caring how many drills I had done or how many matches I had played — it just never let up.  I depended on my hat and sunglasses to shield my head from the blinding sun even though the rest of me felt vulnerable.  By drinking water constantly, I stayed sufficiently hydrated.  I sweated profusely nearly every minute of the day.  There were times I felt so overheated that I had to take refuge under a shady tree.  I must say, however, that all that practice made me a better tennis player.  Plus, that intense, unrelenting heat made me realize that I have what it takes to be a star athlete: resilience and endurance.

Read this paragraph.

Renee ascended the creaky steps into the attic.  A small dirty window at the far end offered little in the way of light.  Renee fumbled for the thin chain overhead and gave it a tug.  After allowing her eyes to adjust to the dim glow of a single bulb, Renee proceeded to look for the old trunk.  Dust and other stuff covered just about everything.

Which sentence(s) could replace the final sentence to make the description more vivid and precise? Select all that apply.

A student is writing a narrative for his class about a recent challenge.  The student wants to revise the draft to improve its organization.  Read the draft and complete the task that follows.

In spite of all the resistance I encountered, joining the school running club last semester was one of the best things I could have done for myself.  My parents discouraged me from participating because they thought I already had more than enough to consume my time.  They warned, "You have academics to focus on in school and chores to focus on at home.  You do not have time to run around."  My teachers discouraged me because they wanted to make sure I was committed to my schoolwork.  They said, "You have struggled with your school workload in the past."  However, a faint voice inside my head said, "You need to get some exercise and fresh air to help clear your mind and ease your stress."  Indeed, all of the days that I participated in the running club were days I felt less stressed and more enthusiastic about school.  Without even feeling overwhelmed, I managed to get straight A's that entire semester.

Choose the sentence that would be the most effective ending for the narrative.

A student is writing a narrative for her class.  The student wants to revise the draft to improve the development of ideas.  Read the draft of the narrative and complete the task that follows.

Samantha and her family traveled through Norway for their summer vacation.  They took a long hike through the forest to reach a beautiful lake they heard about.  On the way there, Samantha's father told the family a tale about the local people believing in mystical beings like trolls and elves.  Samantha laughed the story off because there was no way there were actual elves in the forest.  As the forest got thicker and the trail got smaller, Samantha's family began to hear faint giggles coming from the bushes.  Could it really be true that they were hearing the sounds of the enchanted elves?

The narrative is missing a conclusion.  Choose two sentences that would best finish the narrative by providing closure.

A student has written a story and wants to add an effective conclusion. Read the final paragraph of the story and answer the question that follows.

Madison watched her mother working outside in the garden. She knew how important it was to her mother to get all the seeds in the ground before the big rains, but she hated getting dirty and she hated bugs. Madison’s mother wiped her brow and waved expectantly at her daughter to join her in the backyard. Madison smiled hesitantly and waved back.

Which sentence provides the best ending to the story?

A student is writing a narrative in his language arts class about a summer memory.  The student wants to revise the draft to improve its organization.  Read the draft and complete the task that follows.

After having spent nearly the entire month of June cooped up indoors, I was elated when Micah appeared on my doorstep, two kites in hand, remarking that the wind conditions were ideal for flying kites that balmy July afternoon.  When our kites launched into the sky with very little effort, I appreciated that the wind conditions were in fact ideal.  Or so they seemed...

Only some ten minutes later, several enormous menacing rainclouds, seemingly from out of nowhere, migrated into the skies directly above the park.  Suddenly, the wind turned fierce.  A piñata from a nearby birthday party flew off a tree and nosedived right into the lake.  Paper plates levitated off the picnic table, then swirled around our heads.

Meanwhile, I felt the kite pulling away from me as if it were a gigantic fish struggling to get off my fishing line.  It jerked away as I tried to reel it in.  All of a sudden, it snapped free.  I watched it escape so fast and so high into the atmosphere, and I have not seen it since.

Choose the sentence that would be the most effective ending for the narrative.

A student is writing a mystery for her creative writing class.  The student wants to revise the draft to improve its organization.  Read the draft of the story and complete the task that follows.

Click on the sentence that would best be used as the conclusion for the student's mystery.

The warm southern air thickened around the two sisters as they approached the old plantation house.  Lena had dared her younger sister, Courtney, to enter the abandoned house and climb the stairs to the third floor because it was said to be haunted with strange noises.  Courtney knew it was just a rumor and gladly accepted the dare because she wanted to prove her sister wrong.  Courtney started up the creaky staircase and kicked up dust that made it hard to see down the hallway at the first landing.  Courtney and Lena finally solved the mystery of the supposedly scary noises.  She heard a rustling coming from the first room on the left, and she started to slowly back away in fright.  A moment later, a cat jumped through the dust cloud and ran past Courtney down the staircase.

A student is writing a narrative for his class anthology.  The student wants to revise the draft to improve the development of ideas.  Read the draft of the narrative and complete the task that follows.

Dylan and his father emerged sleepily from their tent when they heard the commotion outside at four o'clock in the morning.  They were camping in the Mojave Desert for a few nights with Dylan's scout troop, learning new survival techniques.  "Fire!  There is a fire!"  They heard another camper yell in a nearby campsite.  Dylan and his father rushed over to see the flames building higher on a pile of camping gear lying on the ground.  As the wind picked up in the middle of the night, the breeze must have blown a hot coal out of the fire pit.  The scouts had participated in several practice drills for putting out fires, but they had never dealt with a real emergency.  This was their opportunity to put their skills to the test and take control of the situation.

The narrative is missing a conclusion.  Choose the sentence that would best provide a conclusion.

A student is writing a personal narrative about her favorite teacher. The student wants to revise the narrative to make sure the conclusion reflects on the experience she describes. Read this paragraph from the student’s narrative and answer the question that follows.

I think I was too young to appreciate the kindness that Mrs. Venti was showing to me. I wish I had thanked her for her patience and encouragement while I was her student. Over the years I found myself remember advice she had given me (including the advice I have not followed.)

Which sentence is the best conclusion for the paragraph?

A student is writing a personal narrative for class.  The student wants to revise the draft to improve its organization.  Read the draft and complete the task that follows.

Last year our school held a "Fitness Fundraiser."  The idea of doing fitness challenges to raise money for our school did not excite me at first.  However, once I got into the spirit of the competition, I enjoyed it immensely.  Of the ten possible fitness challenges I tried in the weeks leading up to the main event, I ended up excelling in three of them: pull–ups, the 100–yard dash, and the 5K run.

I looked forward to the upcoming pull–ups competition most because people were pledging to give me money for however many pull–ups I could do.  That made me want to do as many pull–ups as possible.  I did get frustrated though when there were a bunch of boys doing a lot more pull–ups than I was.  That was when I decided to start working on my upper body strength at home using weights.  Additionally, I dedicated myself to practicing doing pull–ups as often as possible.  On the day of the "Final Fitness Challenge," I received a bronze medal for coming in third in the 5K and a silver medal for coming in second in the 100–yard dash.  Finally, I received the gold medal for doing the most pull–ups!

Choose the sentence that would be the most effective ending for the narrative.