Seek First to Understand, then to be Understood

Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood

By: Daniella Jaimes, Anthony Rodriguez, Mckenzy Gosvenor, Milca Dimas, Natalie Zavala, Austin Blomquist

Multiple Choice

What habit does "seek first to understand, then to be understood" belong to?

• Habit 6

• Habit 3

• Habit 5

• Habit 7

Empathetic Communication​-MD

​We have such a tendency to rush in, to fix things which good adivse but we often fail to take time to diagnose, to really deeply understand the problem first.

Fill in the Blank

What is the most important principle in the field of interpersonal relations?

Character and Communication-DJ​

There is four communication skills that everyone has​ listening, reading, speaking, writing. Comparatively few people have had any training in listening at all. The training has been in the Personality Ethic of technique, shortened from the character base and the relationship base absolutely vital to the authentic understanding of another person. The real key to influence one is through example, actual conduct that flows naturally from one's self.

Multiple Choice

Which communication skill is the least trained?

• writing

• listening

• reading

• speaking

Empathetic Listening​-AR

The key to truly understanding people is empathic listening, which is listening with the intent to see their perspective.

People typically listen in one of four ways:

1. Ignoring: In this case, you’re really not listening to the other person.

2. Pretending: This is when you give automated responses like “right” or “absolutely” at the

appropriate cues, but you’re not actually listening. 

3. Selective Listening: You’re only listening to pieces of what the other person is saying, as we

tend to do when small children are going on incessantly. 

4. Attentive Listening: You’re listening closely to everything the person is saying.​

​

Multiple Choice

Which one is NOT one of the four ways of listening?

• Pretending

• Ignoring

• Sympathetic Listening

• Attentive Listening

Diagnose before you Prescribe​-NZ

Is listening to someone with no judgment to understand each situation or predicament before you give them a good clear judgment or advice that could affect them or their lives, we do not go to the doctor we have no confidence in, that will just hand us random medication that may not be what is needed, and we do not go to lawyers that have no interest in understanding the cases because surely they would lose. No, they diagnose before they prescribe, they gather facts, they understand the law, and if they are good at their job, they write done the opposing's attorneys' case before his own. Why? Because to be successful in jobs, relationships, or anything you must want to actively listen and instead of giving your personal thoughts, give facts good or bad. ​

Fill in the Blank

In what ways can you practice “diagnose before you prescribe?

Four Autobiographical Responses​-MG

​Avoid autobiographical listening- Filtering what they say through your own story.

Try not to project your own autobiography and assuming thoughts, feelings motives, interpretations.

Remember you are dealing with reality inside another person​'s head and heart.

Example: My grandma wants to only talk about her life experience.​

​

Fill in the Blank

What are the FOUR autobiographical responses?

(please separate answers with commas)

Understanding and Perception​-AB

​This allows similar things to be seen differently by different people.

Ex: I might see an "old lady" but you see "an older woman". We both can be right but we see the same thing as two separate phrases.​

This helps expand the communication for both people​ to create a Win/Win solution.

Multiple Choice

How can understanding someone's perception of something help you both work together?

• Allows a Win/Lose so you can win

• Expands communication to deal with issues and come up with a Win/Win

• Makes both of you slack off

Then seek to be understood​-AB

​Seeking to be understood requires consideration and seeking to be understood takes courage .

WIn/Win requires a high degree of both, and in independent situations, it is important for us to be understood.​

Multiple Choice

How can seeking to be understood be achieved?

• Try to make someone understand you but if they don't then tat's all you can do

• If someone does not agree with you then give up

• You must appeal to their emotions and get in their same frame of mind

• You must be independent at all times for them to be understood

• it's the inside-out approach

• your ability to influence others increases​

​Circle of Influence

• problems, disagreements, circumstances, other people's behavior. ​

• low positive results​ if one focuses energies here

​Circle of Concern

One on One​-DJ

​One-on-one is to deeply understand each other in order to come up with creative solutions and third alternatives.

Multiple Choice

To seek first to understand is a powerful habit of effective interdependance.

• True

• False