5.11 c revise and edit

Revision and Editing

I can..
...revise drafts to improve sentence structiure
....revise drafts to improve word choice

​Success Criteria

I'M LEARNING TO revise drafts to improve sentence structure and word choice by adding, deleting, combining, and rearranging ideas for coherence and clarity (R)

​Lesson Objective

Multiple Choice

What is the sentence missing?

The boy to the park yesterday.

• Subject

• Verb

• Punctuation

• Capital letter

Multiple Choice

The subject is…

• Who or what the sentence is about.

• What they are doing

• The verb and the prepositional phrase of the sentence.

Multiple Choice

What correction can be made to the following sentence?

Kaitlyn and Todd played in the treehouse

• Changed played to play

• Change Kaitlyn to kaitlyn

• Add a period after treehouse

• Change the to a

Dropdown

Simona were a role model for her sister.

Select a response that corrects this sentence.

Simona ​

Select answer

a role model for her sister.

Multiple Choice

What is the verb in the sentence?

My mom and I went to the grocery store.

• My mom and I

• Grocery store

• Went

• To

Dropdown

1.Jemima loves going to the movies. 2.She saw the Little Mermaid. 3.Was her favorite movie of the summer.

Select the response that corrects the sentence.

1.Jemima loves going to the movies. 2.She saw the Little Mermaid. 3.​

Select answer

her favorite movie of the summer.

Multiple Choice

What is the verb in the sentence?

Kimber ran her heart out on the field.

• Ran

• Kimber

• Heart

• Field

Multiple Choice

1.April watched her neice and nephew while they're mom went out for the night.

2.With their dad.

3.april played trains with them they watched a movie called monsters inc they all had a good time

Which change needs to be made to this passage.

• Capitalize april in sentence 3

• Capitalize nephew in sentence 1

• Capitalize trains in sentence 3

• No change

Multiple Choice

1.April watched her neice and nephew while they're mom went out for the night.

2.With their dad.

3.april played trains with them they watched a movie called monsters inc they all had a good time

Which change needs to be made to this passage.

• Combine sentence 1 and 2

• Combine sentence 2 and 3

• Remove sentence 1

• No change

Multiple Choice

1.April watched her neice and nephew while they're mom went out for the night.

2.With their dad.

3.april played trains with them they watched a movie called monsters inc they all had a good time

What is the best way to revise sentence 3?

• April played trains with them. They also watched a movie called Monsters Inc. They all had a good time!

• April played trains with them. They also watched a movie called monsters inc they all had a good time!

• April played trains with them they all had a good time

• No change

Multiple Choice

1.i went camping with my family.

2.We whent fishing and I caught a big fish.

3.I also whent Swimming with my brother.

4.We hade a camp fire every night.

5.The camping trip was lots of fun

What changes should be made to the passage?

• Change whent to went

• change family to familie

• Change fire to fyre

• No change

Multiple Choice

1.i went camping with my family.

2.We whent fishing and I caught a big fish.

3.I also whent Swimming with my brother.

4.We hade a camp fire every night.

5.The camping trip was lots of fun

What changes should be made to the passage?

• Change Swimming to swimming

• change family to Family

• Change fire to Fire

• No change

Multiple Choice

Read the following paragraph and answer the question that follows.

 

(1) During the snowstorm ended, I decided to go for a walk in the park. (2) I wondered how much snow had fallen on the ground. (3) I put in my heavy coat and winter boots. (4) My mom bought me these boots last year, but they still fit. (5) Then I walked down the snowy sidewalk to the front gate in the park. (6) I was lucky someone had already shoveled the paths. (7) Because of that, I did not have to wade among deep snow. (8) Snow can be beautiful, but it’s a pain to walk through. (9) The trees looked magical with their branches covered of snow. (10) A hush fell near the park, and not a single sound could be heard. (11) Then I heard the faint call of birds on the distance. (12) After passing the pond, I began to head home. (13) I had lost track of time and arrived home before breakfast.  

 

There is an unnecessary sentence in this paragraph. Which sentence should be deleted from this paragraph?

• Sentence 3

• Sentence 4

• Sentence 5

• Sentence 6

Multiple Choice

 

(1) During the snowstorm ended, I decided to go for a walk in the park.

What change needs to be made in sentence 1?

• Change During to After

• Change During to Before

• Change in to on

• Change in to from

Multiple Choice

(3) I put in my heavy coat and winter boots.

What change, if any, should be made in sentence 3?

• Insert a comma after coat

• Change winter to Winter

• Change in to on

• No change is needed.

Multiple Choice

(5) Then I walked down the snowy sidewalk to the front gate in the park.

What revision, if any, should be made in sentence 5?

• Change to to from

• Change in to of

• Insert a comma after sidewalk

• No change is needed.

Multiple Choice

(9) The trees looked magical with their branches covered of snow.

What change, if any, should be made in sentence 9?

• Change of to in

• Change of to on

• Change of to with

• No change is needed.

Multiple Choice

Read the following paragraph and answer the question that follows.

 

(1) We have two cats. (2) They think they’re in charge. (3) Turns out – they’re right. (4) When the cats want something. (5) They meow and make their voices herd. (6) Their names our Lucy and Ethel. (7) That’s because they’re best friends and they are always getting into trouble.

Which sentence could best be added before sentence 1 to improve this paragraph’s opening?

• Many people have more than one pet.

• In our house, the cats make the rules.

• Cats are incredible animals and great pets.

• For years, people have had cats as pets.

Dropdown

My mother_______a lot of fruits and vegetables at the farmers' market tonight.

Select answer

Multiple Choice

Many electrical appliances __________ destroyed in the fire yesterday.

• is

• are

• was

• were

Revise & edit

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​Exit Ticket