English I Spring Benchmark Writing

What is the most effective way to combine sentences 3 and 4?

• But online networking, which is very popular with teens today, promotes short, superficial connections.

• But online networking promotes short, superficial connections, it is very popular with teens today.

• But onlline networking that promotes short, superficial connections, it is very popular with teens today.

• But online networking promotes short, superficial connections with teens today, which it is very popular.

How can Susan improve the clarity of sentence 12?

• Change these teens to they

• Change they to researchers

• Change suggesting to saying

• Change a while to some time

What is the most effective revision to make in sentence 16?

• Everyone communicates in person in one way, they communicate in different ways over the phone, through texting, or in online posts.

• Everyone communicates differently in person than they do when speaking over the phone, sending texts, or writing online posts.

• Everyone communicates in person differently than they do over the phone, to send texts, or posting online.

• Everyone communicates in person, over the phone, through texting, or in online posts

Susan needs a better transition from the third paragraph (sentences 15-20) to the fourth paragraph (sentences 21-25). Which of the following can be added to the beginning of the fourth paragraph, just before sentence 21, to strengthen this transition?

• This ability to communicate in person becomes even more important as teenagers get older.

• In a few short years, most teens in our school will be entering the job market or college.

• Learning to read people's communication cues will help build opportunities for teens.

• In a business setting, a teen will need to know how to understand his coworkers.

Sentence 26 does not effectively open the last paragraph (sentences 26-28). Which of the following can replace sentence 26 and help strengthen the concluding paragraph of this paper?

• Dealing with people when you are a teen offline will help you in a handful of critical ways.

• Offline networking is important because it can improve a teenager's well-being and help prepare him for the future.

• Both online and offline relationships are important in today's world of instant communication.

• Every teen will need to practice offline communication so they can get used to talking with others,

Anika has written a weak thesis statement for her paper. Which of the following can replace sentences 4 and 5 and serve as a more effective thesis for this paper?

• The people who live in Coober Pedy love their special little city. All of these people have made a decision to live in a unique way.

• It isn't what you can see that makes this city amazing; it's what you cannot see. There are 3,500 people who call Coober Pedy home, and almost all of them live and work under ground.

• Coober Pedy's interesting history includes miners, people living under ground, very hot weather, and media attention. All of this put together makes Cobber Pedy an interesting place to me.

• It isn't because it's abandoned that Coober Pedy is fascinating; it's because it only looks abandoned since people are really living under ground.

Anika has not used the most effective transition in sentence 8. Which of the following should replace After all in this sentence?

• Soon

• Instead

• Finally

• Otherwise

How should sentence 20 be revised?

• To enhance their surroundings, installing fake windows and decorative drapes helped some people.

• To enhance their surroundings, some people install fake windows and they also use decorative drapes.

• To enhance their surroundings, fake windows with decorative drapes are installed by some people to help them.

• To enhance their surroundings, some people install fake windows with decorative drapes.

Which of these ideas could best follow and support sentence 23?

• More than 150,000 people visit the small town each year, and a host of movies, including Kangaroo Jack, Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, and Opal Dream, have been filmed there.

• Coober Pedy residents now make their livelihood in both the tourism industry and opal-mining industry, and this keeps most of the people working and able to provide for their families.

• Today the people in this town get the vast majority of their water from under ground from a source 24 kilometers away that has to be pumped in via an underground pipeline.

• Since February of 1915, many of the highest-quality opals in the entire world have been found in Coober Pedy; in fact, Coober Pedy is sometimes even referred to as the opal capital of the world.

How should sentence 5 be changed?

• Change explore to explored

• Change were written to was written

• Change years to year's

• Change you to they