Revising EOC

Which of the following, if any, could replace sentence 6 to create a more effective controlling idea?

• On the other hand, six-man football uses only six players for a game, so the chances of developing another Von Miller are slim.

• Significantly, unlike Von Miller's experience, many teams from small towns in Texas play games with only six men, because the players all want to be Von Miller.

• However, in 138 small towns across Texas, younger NFL hopefuls, dreaming of becoming another Von Miller, play games known as six-man football.

• Sentence 6 is written correctly in the paper.

Barrett has not used an appropriate transition in sentence 22. Which of these could best replace THEREFORE and create a more appropriate transition between sentences 21 and 22.

• Consequently

• In addition

• However

• No change needs to be made in this sentence.

What is the most effective revision to make in sentence 4?

• He was a product of Texas high school football program.

• Von Miller gave credit to his high school football coach.

• "I did not learn in California or Florida, but Texas," Miller might have said.

• Von has one idea, but people might have others, depending on who you ask.

What change, if any, should be made in sentence 2?

• Change hardly to really

• Delete so

• Insert a comma after plants

• No change should be made in this sentence.

How should sentence 5 be changed?

• Change came to comes

• Change existense to existence

• Change the question mark to an exclamation point

• Sentence 5 should not be changed.

What change, if any, should be made in sentence 2?

• Change environment to enviroment

• Delete the comma

• Change your to you’re

• No change should be made in this sentence.

What change should be made in sentence 13?

• Delete where

• Insert a comma after class

• Change a lot to alot

• Change means to had meant

How should sentence 15 be changed?

• Change experiences to experience’s

• Change will help to helped

• Change acomplished to accomplished

• Sentence 15 should not be changed.

What change should be made in sentence 22?

• Insert a comma after day after day

• Change that to this

• Change am to was

• No change should be made in sentence 22.

What is the correct way to write sentence 26?

• In closing, I give you this solemn promise. That if you elect me as president of the sophomore class, I’ll give it my all.

• In closing, I give you this solemn promise: if you elect me as president of the sophomore class, I’ll give it my all.

• In closing, to give you this solemn promise: if you elect me as president of the sophomore class, I’ll give it my all.

• Sentence 26 is written correctly in the paper