TED: Even healthy couples fight — the difference is how | Julie and John Gottman

The video explores the dynamics of romantic relationships, emphasizing that how couples fight is crucial to their success. Research from the Gutmann Institute shows that fighting can be beneficial if done correctly. The study identifies three conflict styles and highlights the importance of maintaining a positive-to-negative interaction ratio. It warns against the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse—criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling—as predictors of relationship failure. Effective conflict resolution involves understanding and managing perpetual problems. The video concludes with a call to use these insights to foster better relationships and a more peaceful world.

What are some examples of positive responses during conflict discussions?

How does flooding affect communication during conflicts?

What role does physiological calmness play in resolving conflicts?

Discuss the importance of understanding each partner's dreams in conflict resolution.