Conflict & Conflict Styles

Conflict & Conflict Styles

Open Ended

What do you remember about the definition of conflict? In other words, how do you know when there is a conflict?

Multiple Select

A conflict involves the following:

• an expressed struggle

• perceived incompatible goals

• interdependence

• perceived scarce resources

• interference from the other party

Multiple Choice

It's possible to have a conflict with someone without them knowing it.

• True

• False

To have a conflict:

• Someone needs to express that there's a problem.

• It seems, to one or both parties, that they can't both get what they want (perceived incompatible goals).

• Each party depends on the other in some way (interdependence).

• It seems, to one or both parties, that there isn't enough of something for both of them (perceived scarce resources).

• It seems like one or both parties is interfering with what the other wants.

To have a conflict: Example

• Jaclyn has been late for her last five shifts. Her manager, Katie, tells her that this isn't acceptable. Jaclyn cries and runs away.

• Was a problem or struggle expressed?

• e.g., Maybe Jaclyn has been waking up late because she got a second job. She wants to keep both jobs and doesn't like being confronted about being late. Katie needs her to show up on time. (perceived incompatible goals).

To have a conflict: Example

• Jaclyn needs her job and wants her manager to respect her. Katie needs her staff to be reliable and on time (interdependence).

• It seems to Katie that there isn't enough time for her to do what she wants and needs to do. Jaclyn is concerned that she won't have enough staff on duty (perceived scarce resources).

• Jaclyn feels Katie's criticism is interfering with her goal to work both jobs and not be bothered. Katie feels Jaclyn is interfering with her goal of running the restaurant smoothly.

Multiple Select

Conflict is ______.

• something we should avoid at all costs.

• scary and bad.

• natural and inevitable.

• something that can improve a relationship.

Open Ended

What do you remember about conflict styles?

5 Conflict Styles

• Competing (win/lose, "my way")

• Avoiding (lose/lose, "no way")

• Accommodating (lose/win, "your way")

• Compromising (partial lose/lose, "half way")

• Collaborating (win/win, "our way")

Multiple Choice

Staying away from someone or changing the topic is an example of which conflict style?

• Competing (win-lose or "my way")

• Avoiding (lose-lose or "no way")

• Accommodating (lose-win or "your way")

Multiple Choice

Avoiding is a conflict style that ______.

• is never useful.

• can be necessary in some situations.

• is only for babies.

Multiple Choice

Giving in to what others want or "taking one for the team" is an example of which conflict style?

• Competing (win-lose or "my way")

• Avoiding (lose-lose or "no way")

• Accommodating (lose-win or "your way")

Multiple Choice

Sarah wants to go to Wendy's for lunch, but Sam wants to go to McDonald's. Sarah lets Sam have his way, and they go to McDonald's. What conflict style is Sarah using?

• Competing (win-lose or "my way")

• Avoiding (lose-lose or "no way")

• Accommodating (lose-win or "your way")

Multiple Choice

Using this conflict style shows a high concern for one's own needs and a low concern for the needs of others.

• Competing (Win-Lose)

• Accommodating (Lose-Win)

• Avoiding (Lose-Lose) 

• Compromising (Partial Lose-Lose)

Multiple Choice

A person who uses this conflict style may have some power or authority over others or they may feel like they need to "defeat" an "opponent" and "win."

• Competing (Win-Lose)

• Accommodating (Lose-Win)

• Avoiding (Lose-Lose) 

• Compromising (Partial Lose-Lose)

Compromising (Partial lose-lose)

​"Halfway"

• Both get some of what they want

• Can be effective way to handle conflicts if no alternative solution

• Often, with a bit more effort, a better solution can be found.
  

Compromising (Partial lose-lose)

​"Halfway"

• Some compromises bad (e.g., One person wants a dog, but the other person is allergic, so they get a hairless cat. Both are unsatisfied.)

• Can be beneficial at times (e.g., can't decide on restaurant so opt for both people's second choice) 
  

Collaborating (win-win)

​"Our way"

• High degree of concern for self and others

• Attempt to meet everyone's needs

• Generally, better than win-lose or lose-lose, but there are times when other styles are more appropriate
  

Collaborating (win-win)

​"Our way"

• Example: Store manager hated rescheduling employee shifts. With staff, came up with idea to have employees organize own schedule switches and inform her of changes by email. ​

• They can switch shifts, so they win.

• She doesn't have to deal with this, so she wins.
  

Multiple Choice

Server Bobbi asks his coworker, Jeff, to take his shift tonight so he can go to a concert. Jeff doesn't really want to, but he says he will do it if Bobbi takes his Sunday morning shift (which Jeff doesn't want). They both get some of what they want. Which conflict style does this sound like?

• Avoiding (lose-lose or "no way")

• Collaborating (win-win or "our way")

• Compromising (partial lose-lose or "halfway")

Multiple Choice

Two instructors are teaching the same class to different groups of students. They are both extremely busy and are getting grumpy with each other. To save time and be less stressed, they decide to divide up the content so each of them only has to create lesson plans for half of the content. Which conflict style are they using?

• Avoiding (lose-lose or "no way")

• Collaborating (win-win or "our way")

• Compromising (partial lose-lose or "halfway")

Multiple Choice

Holly and Brad are arguing because Brad wants to go out with his friends, but she wants him to stay home with her. She tells him that if he goes, he's a loser and he will be sorry when he comes back. Brad ends up staying home. What conflict style is Holly using?

• Avoiding (lose-lose or "no way")

• Collaborating (win-win or "our way")

• Compromising (partial lose-lose or "halfway")

• Competing (win-lose or "my way")

What style should I use?

• Depends on:

• Relationship (e.g., accommodation best if other has more power than you, e.g. boss) 

• Situation

• Other person (may be unwilling or unable to collaborate) 

• Goals (e.g., having a good relationship with your neighbour may be more important to you than their dog barking) 
  

Watch "Should Michael Drive the Forklift?"

• Do you think there is a conflict?

• What parts of a conflict can you identify?

• Expressed struggle

• Perceived incompatible goals

• Perceived scarce resources

• Interdependence

• Interference

Poll

What conflict style do you think Darrell should use in this situation?

• Avoiding (lose-lose, "no way")

• Accommodating (lose-win, "your way")

• Competing (win-lose, "my way")

• Compromising (partial lose-lose, "halfway")

• Collaborating (win-win, "our way")

Practice

• You're Darrell. How would you use the conflict style of your choice to handle this situation (in the moment and/or after the conversation)?

• What would you say? How would you say it?

• Discuss your answer with your partner. Be ready to share your ideas with the class.