Revising & Editing: Encanto & Moana STAAR EOC Practice

Jade wants to replace the transition used in sentence 2. What is the most effective transition to use at the beginning of sentence 2?

• Even though,
• Yet,
• However,
• Additionally,

What change if any should be made to sentence 4?

• Delete the comma after music
• Change great-grandmother’s to great-grandmothers
• Change access to excess
• Add a comma after trauma

What change if any should be made in sentence 5?

• Change forbaded to forbids
• Add a comma after music
• Change family to Family
• No change is needed

Jade want to add this sentence to her 2nd paragraph (sentences 3-11). "He feels happy and alive when he is surrounded by music." Where is the most effective place to insert this sentence?

• After sentence 6
• After sentence 7
• After sentence 8
• After sentence 9

What is the best way for Jade to combine sentences 8-10?

• He secretly learned to play music by listening to one of his favorite artists and by practicing everyday and by watching his films.
• He secretly learned to play music by listening to one of his favorite artist: and by practicing every day and by watching his movies
• He secretly learned to play music because he watched his favorite artist play music and practiced everyday listening to music.
• He secretly learned to play music by listening to one of his favorite artists, watching his films, and practicing everyday.

Which sentence in the third paragraph is extra and should be deleted?

• Sentence 15
• Sentence 16
• Sentence 17
• Sentence 18

What change, if any, should be made to sentence 20?

• Delete the comma after However
• Change to to too
• Add a comma after herself
• No change is needed

What change, if any, should be made to sentence 18?

• Delete the comma after end
• Change turns to turn’s
• Change peace to piece
• Add a comma after valuable

How should sentence 22 be revised?

• If Namaari would not have defied her family, then things would have turned out differently.
• If Namaari would not have gone against her family’s wishes, then multiple villages and many people would have perished at the hands of the Druun.
• Multiple villages and many people would have perished at the hands of the Druun resulting from Namaari going against her family’s wishes.
• Namaari going against her family’s wishes caused changes for many people.

What change, if any, should be made to sentence 23?

• Add a comma after conclusion
• Change expectations to expectations
• Change affect to effect
• Make no change