STAAR Practice Revise and Edit

Which sentence should replace sentence 3 to create a more effective introduction to this paper?

• Fortunately, we live close to the coast and are able to make frequent trips to the beach.

• Additionally, my favorite family activity is movie night, especially when the movie is about animals.

• Truthfully, I have a hard time deciding what to bring with me, and I typically pack too much.

• Admittedly, I have at times been less than thrilled to tag along on these wild excursions.

What is the BEST way to revise sentence 14?

• After we got off the ferry and into a rental car, wildlife is what my mother began looking for and a good place to turn off the road.

• After we got off the ferry and into a rental car, my mother began looking for a good place to turn off the road to look for wildlife.

• After we got off the ferry to begin looking for wildlife, we were into a rental car, and my mother was looking for a good place to turn off.

• After we got off the ferry and into a rental car and began looking for wildlife, my mother began looking for a good place.

Akim needs a better transition between the fifth paragraph (sentences 16–20) and the sixth paragraph (sentences 21–26). Which sentence should replace sentence 21 to improve this transition?

• We quickly pulled into a parking area above a river and exited the car.

• My father stopped the car, and he announced that he was getting hungry.

• As the car came to a stop, I wondered if we would ever get to the lodge.

• Before long we got to a place, and then Dad decided to stop the car.

Akim wants to combine the ideas in sentences 30 and 31. In the box provided, write a new sentence that combines these ideas in a clear and effective way.

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Which sentence could BEST follow sentence 7 to support the ideas presented in the second paragraph (sentences 6–8)?

• My dad is an auto mechanic at a large car dealership, so he often has to work on the weekends.

• My sister is a few years older than me, and she has always done quite well in school.

• My mom plans meals months in advance, and my sister turns in projects before they are due.

• My parents enjoy traveling around the state and learning more about history.

Niko has included a sentence that does not belong in the fourth paragraph (sentences 15–19). Which sentence should he remove from this paragraph?

• Sentence 15

• Sentence 17

• Sentence 18

• Sentence 19

What is the MOST effective revision to make in sentence 23?

• In a panic I ransacked our recycle bin, pulling out brown cardboard boxes, paper towel tubes, and paper scraps that I hastily glued together.

• In a panic I ransacked our recycle bin, pulling out brown cardboard boxes, paper towel tubes, and there were paper scraps that I hastily and quickly glued together.

• In a panic I ransacked our recycle bin, hastily and quickly gluing together what I pulled out, which was brown cardboard boxes, paper towel tubes, and paper scraps.

• In a panic I ransacked our recycle bin, pulling out and removing brown cardboard boxes, paper towel tubes, and paper scraps for hastily gluing together.

The word unusual is not the MOST appropriate word to use in sentence 25. Select the ONE correct word that should replace unusual in this sentence. When I entered the cafeteria and saw everyone else’s models on display, I felt even more ______ about mine.

• indifferent

• suspicious

• irritated

• embarrassed

Niko forgot to include this sentence in the last paragraph (sentences 29-33). "I have the satisfaction of knowing that I won't have to scramble at the last minute." Where is the BEST place to insert this sentence?

• After sentence 29

• After sentence 30

• After sentence 32

• After sentence 33

What change should be made in sentence 2?

• Change Headlines to headlines

• Change allow to allows

• Insert a comma after readers

• Change quickly to quick