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Worksheets

jokes

Total questions: 63

Worksheet time: 30mins

Name
Class
Date
1.

Why did the computer go to the doctor?

a)

It had a fever.

b)

It was overheating.

c)

It had a virus.

d)

It was sick.

2.

Two pickles fell out of a jar. What did one say to the other?

a)

Are you ok?

b)

Dill with it.

c)

Ouch!

d)

I'm a sweet pickle.

3.

What building in Toledo has the most stories?

a)

The Toledo Building

b)

Glendale-Feilbach Elementary School

c)

The Empire State Building

d)

The Public Library

4.

How does a scientist freshen her breath?

a)

with TicTacs

b)

with science gum

c)

with experi-"mints"

d)

with her science magic

5.

What do you call a funny mountain?

a)

hysterical

b)

a jokester

c)

"hill"arious

d)

a comedian

6.

What stays in the corner but can travel all over the world?

a)

a stamp

b)

a naughty child

c)

the broom

d)

a lamp

7.

What is a computers favorite snack?

a)

computer chips

b)

nacho chips

c)

potato chips

d)

corn chips

8.

How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?

a)

with super glue

b)

with a needle and thread

c)

you can't fix a cracked pumpkin

d)

with a pumpkin patch

9.

Why aren't dogs good dancers?

a)

they have two right feet

b)

they have two left feet

c)

they have four legs

d)

they can't do ballet

10.

Why couldn't the man book a hotel room on the moon?

a)

because it was full

b)

because he didn't have a credit card

c)

because he didn't have any money

d)

because the moon was out of space

11.

What do you call an old snowman?

a)

Gramps

b)

Old Snow

c)

Water

d)

Geezer

12.

Why are robots never afraid?

a)

they have lots of guts

b)

they don't have a brain

c)

they aren't ever nervous

d)

they have nerves of steel

13.

Why did the cabbage win the race?

a)

because it was ahead

b)

because it was in the lead

c)

because it ate a good breakfast

d)

because it was green

14.

What do you get when you cross a snake with a pie?

a)

a pie thon

b)

a snake and bean pie

c)

bitten

d)

something yucky

15.

Why was the broom running late?

a)

it was stuck in the corner

b)

it missed it's ride

c)

it overslept

d)

it overswept

16.

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school?

a)

her students were so bright

b)

her students had bright lights on

c)

the sun was in her eyes

d)

her eyes were red from allergies

17.

Where do sheep go on vacation?

a)

baaack to the pasture

b)

baaa hamas

c)

baaa humbug

d)

baaa ha ha nowhere

18.

What does every birthday end with?

a)

presents!

b)

blowing out the candles

c)

the letter y

d)

cleaning up the mess

19.

Can February March?

a)

yes

b)

no

c)

maybe so

d)

no, but April May

20.

Why isn't there a clock in the library?

a)

because it tocks too much

b)

because it ticks too much

c)

because books can't tell time

d)

because it's against the library law

21.

What did you call a Dinosaur that is sleeping?

a)

A dino-Snore!

b)

Asleep dino

c)

A sleeping dog

d)

A sleeping beast

22.

What is fast, loud, and crunchy?

a)

A rocket chip!

b)

Chip

c)

Color chip

d)

Rocket car

23.

What did the left eye say to the right eye?

a)

Between us, something smells like diarrhea!

b)

Between us, something sicks

c)

Between us, something I am hunger!

d)

Between us, something smells!

24.

What did one plate say to the other plate?

a)

You are hot

b)

Dinner is on me!

c)

I love you

d)

You are too cold

25.

Why did the student eat his/her homework?

a)

Because teacher told him/her it was a none homework!

b)

Because teacher told him/her it was a piece of candy.

c)

Because teacher told him/her it was a piece of cake!

d)

Because teacher told him/her it was lomond pines.

26.

Two pickels fell out of a jar onto the floor. What did one say to the other?

a)

Diarrhea

b)

It a tie

c)

I love you

d)

Dill with it.

27.

How do you stop an astronut's baby from crying?

a)

You sing him/her a song

b)

You rocket!

c)

You give him/her a milk

d)

Do not cry

28.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

a)

Because 7 ate 5

b)

Because 7 ate 9

c)

Becasue 7, 8 , 9

d)

Because 8 ate 7

29.

What do you call a duck that gets all A's

a)

Hot water

b)

A palm tree

c)

Because it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull

d)

A wise Quacker

30.

What kind of tree fits in your hand?

a)

A coconut tree

b)

A palm tree!

c)

A strader tree

d)

An apple tree

31.

Match

a)
b)
c)
32.

Match

a)
b)
c)
33.

Match

a)
b)
c)
34.

Match

a)
b)
c)
35.

Match

a)
b)
c)
36.

What did the egg say when it answered the door?

a)
b)
c)
d)
37.

Why do dragon sleep during the day?

a)
b)
c)
d)
38.

What do librarians take with them when they go fishing?

a)
b)
c)
d)
39.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Adore. Adore who?.........

a)
b)
c)
d)
40.

Why was the baby ant confused?

a)
b)
c)
d)
41.

What type of bee can't make up its mind?

a)
b)
c)
d)
42.

Where do bees go to the bathroom?

a)
b)
c)
d)
43.

What goes snap crackle and squeak?

a)
b)
c)
d)
44.
a)
b)
c)
d)
45.

a)
b)
c)
d)
46.

a)
b)
c)
d)
47.

a)
b)
c)
d)
48.

How do you say goodbye to a Hotdog?

a)
b)
c)
d)
49.

Do you want to Taco'Bout it?

a)
b)
c)
d)
50.

Why did the corn leave his field and cross the road?

a)
b)
c)
d)
51.

How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?

a)
b)
c)
d)
52.

How did the vegetable cheered the gardener at the country fair?

a)
b)
c)
d)
53.

Why are bananas never lonely?

a)
b)
c)
d)
54.

What kind of key open a banana?

a)
b)
c)
d)
55.

You must be yoking...

a)
b)
c)
d)
56.

I'm in a serious relation-chip

a)
b)
c)
d)
57.

Grandma!!!

a)
b)
c)
d)
58.

I phone, you tube.

a)
b)
c)
d)
59.

This might sound cheesy...

a)
b)
c)
d)
60.

What kind of teeth do deer have?

a)
b)
c)
d)
61.

How do trees get online?

a)
b)
c)
d)
62.

What do you call an alligator in a vest?

a)
b)
c)
d)
63.

This is a 'Grate' party....

a)
b)
c)
d)