Assertiveness Sample Sceanarios

Your friend wants you to lend your phone to her for the day because she broke hers and is in the process of getting a new one. You are not too sure given the potential breach of privacy. However, it is your friend and you know how she likes to stay connected to others through social media.

• "I know you like to sing, but I simply cannot tolerate it right now. If you don't stop, I am going to have to stop the car and get out."

• "I have personal obligations at the moment. If my schedule allows, I may be able to help out next time. Thank you for thinking of me."

• "I understand your need to keep up to date and keep connected. My phone is personal and costly. My value of privacy does not allow me to share with a peer. I want to help, yet it is a boundary that cannot be crossed How about I go a day without my phone with you?"

• "I feel sad when I come home and no one seems happy to see me or asks how my day was. I feel as if no one cares and I am not appreciated."

Every day when you come home, your family seems to ignore you or is preoccupied by other things and continues doing whatever they're doing. No one acknowledges you or asks how your day was.

• "I know you like to sing, but I simply cannot tolerate it right now. If you don't stop, I am going to have to stop the car and get out."

• "I have personal obligations at the moment. If my schedule allows, I may be able to help out next time. Thank you for thinking of me."

• "I understand your need to keep up to date and keep connected. My phone is personal and costly. My value of privacy does not allow me to share with a peer. I want to help, yet it is a boundary that cannot be crossed How about I go a day without my phone with you?"

• "I feel sad when I come home and no one seems happy to see me or asks how my day was. I feel as if no one cares and I am not appreciated."

Someone in the car you are riding in decides to sign off key and continues to do so for 20 minutes. It begins to get on your nerves and you politely ask her to stop, but she doesn't.

• "I know you like to sing, but I simply cannot tolerate it right now. If you don't stop, I am going to have to stop the car and get out."

• "I have personal obligations at the moment. If my schedule allows, I may be able to help out next time. Thank you for thinking of me."

• "I understand your need to keep up to date and keep connected. My phone is personal and costly. My value of privacy does not allow me to share with a peer. I want to help, yet it is a boundary that cannot be crossed How about I go a day without my phone with you?"

• "I feel sad when I come home and no one seems happy to see me or asks how my day was. I feel as if no one cares and I am not appreciated."

You go to school, have a sports schedule, get your siblings off the bus and cook dinner on nights when your parents have an evening shift. Your best friend persistently asks you to fill in for her babysitting job one night because she just got tickets to see an upcoming concert.

• "I know you like to sing, but I simply cannot tolerate it right now. If you don't stop, I am going to have to stop the car and get out."

• "I have personal obligations at the moment. If my schedule allows, I may be able to help out next time. Thank you for thinking of me."

• "I understand your need to keep up to date and keep connected. My phone is personal and costly. My value of privacy does not allow me to share with a peer. I want to help, yet it is a boundary that cannot be crossed How about I go a day without my phone with you?"

• "I feel sad when I come home and no one seems happy to see me or asks how my day was. I feel as if no one cares and I am not appreciated."

You planned to meet up with one of your friends at her house. You get there, and she's late getting ready again. She is repeatedly late every time you make plans and you end up sitting and waiting again.

• "I feel overwhelmed when you don't pitch in and help keep the room clean. I understand that you don't like having me remind you to clean your side of the room, but it is a shared responsibility that is expected of each of us."

• "Did something happen unexpectedly that made you late? It bothers me when I have to wait time and time again because you are often late. It makes me anxious and feel like I am not a priority. Is there something I can do to help you fix this?"

• "This is the fourth time that I have done the work for you because you have other things to do. I am your friend but I feel that you are taking advantage of me putting me in the position when there are consequences for copying. Also, it stresses me out when I have extra work to do that is not my own. I am willing to help you answer questions or study, but I will have to decline on doing the work for you."

• "My policy is to not to share any combinations or passcodes with anyone. My jacket, bag, and accessories don't leave for extra space."

Your friend wants you to do his assignment because he is in rush and knows you complete assignments efficiently. This has happened frequently and appears to be becoming a habit.

• "I feel overwhelmed when you don't pitch in and help keep the room clean. I understand that you don't like having me remind you to clean your side of the room, but it is a shared responsibility that is expected of each of us."

• "Did something happen unexpectedly that made you late? It bothers me when I have to wait time and time again because you are often late. It makes me anxious and feel like I am not a priority. Is there something I can do to help you fix this?"

• "This is the fourth time that I have done the work for you because you have other things to do. I am your friend but I feel that you are taking advantage of me putting me in the position when there are consequences for copying. Also, it stresses me out when I have extra work to do that is not my own. I am willing to help you answer questions or study, but I will have to decline on doing the work for you."

• "My policy is to not to share any combinations or passcodes with anyone. My jacket, bag, and accessories don't leave for extra space."

Your friend wants your locker combination to throw in their stuff in between classes so they are not late for class but that requires you to free up space you may not have in your locker and share your combination.

• "I feel overwhelmed when you don't pitch in and help keep the room clean. I understand that you don't like having me remind you to clean your side of the room, but it is a shared responsibility that is expected of each of us."

• "Did something happen unexpectedly that made you late? It bothers me when I have to wait time and time again because you are often late. It makes me anxious and feel like I am not a priority. Is there something I can do to help you fix this?"

• "This is the fourth time that I have done the work for you because you have other things to do. I am your friend but I feel that you are taking advantage of me putting me in the position when there are consequences for copying. Also, it stresses me out when I have extra work to do that is not my own. I am willing to help you answer questions or study, but I will have to decline on doing the work for you."

• "My policy is to not to share any combinations or passcodes with anyone. My jacket, bag, and accessories don't leave for extra space."

Your sibling is known to get angry every time you try to tell him to clean up the room you share or help out around the house.

• "I feel overwhelmed when you don't pitch in and help keep the room clean. I understand that you don't like having me remind you to clean your side of the room, but it is a shared responsibility that is expected of each of us."

• "Did something happen unexpectedly that made you late? It bothers me when I have to wait time and time again because you are often late. It makes me anxious and feel like I am not a priority. Is there something I can do to help you fix this?"

• "This is the fourth time that I have done the work for you because you have other things to do. I am your friend but I feel that you are taking advantage of me putting me in the position when there are consequences for copying. Also, it stresses me out when I have extra work to do that is not my own. I am willing to help you answer questions or study, but I will have to decline on doing the work for you."

• "My policy is to not to share any combinations or passcodes with anyone. My jacket, bag, and accessories don't leave for extra space."

The semester changes and you find yourself in a new course without any close friends in the class. You are expected to choose a partner for a class activity and find yourself unsure of what to say or whom to go to.

• "Would you mind working together for this activity?" You ask our partner their name and what class they had before this one to 'break the ice'. You proceed to follow the instructions set forth by the teacher

• "Did something happen unexpectedly that made you late? It bothers me when I have to wait time and time again because you are often late. It makes me anxious and feel like I am not a priority. Is there something I can do to help you fix this?"

• "This is the fourth time that I have done the work for you because you have other things to do. I am your friend but I feel that you are taking advantage of me putting me in the position when there are consequences for copying. Also, it stresses me out when I have extra work to do that is not my own. I am willing to help you answer questions or study, but I will have to decline on doing the work for you."

• "My policy is to not to share any combinations or passcodes with anyone. My jacket, bag, and accessories don't leave for extra space."